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what is this life?

I had a moment this weekend, vending at Curtis Fest, under a canopy of trees, where it just washed over me, one of those “what is this beautiful life?” moments.

I zoomed out and saw myself in this city. Sacramento. My chosen home. No one is more surprised than me how quickly and deeply I’ve fallen in love with this city. The trees. The old homes. The parks. The arts. The sunshine. The community. The balance.

And I know from speaking to others that this is not a universal experience. There are folks that loathe this city that I so love. I don’t take it for granted. I acknowledge that in my little bubble of yoga + arts + crafts + cats + tacos + sweet old homes, I may have curated the very best of what Sacramento has on offer.

And in that moment, I saw myself in this neighborhood. Curtis Park. This beautiful, gorgeous, charming, tree-lined neighborhood. There are no words. I can not really even believe I live here.

And I met my neighbors. Old timers and transplants. All with the same love of this hood. Friendly faces. Big smiles. Welcoming. Supportive.

And I saw myself absolutely one hundred percent in my element. Swooning over jewels. Talking of crystals + energy. Fair trade this. Sustainably harvested that. Inspirations. Intentions. Prayers.

I saw myself in a booth, that while still not perfect (oh what a constant work in progress), feels like me.

Pulling unbranded crystal cards that feel like fortunes to me, out of an antique recipe box. Placing them with their crystals in sweet little pouches with a sticker that bears the logo that chose me more than I chose it.

I saw all the little efforts and decisions of the last 5+ years since this creative venture of mine came into existence.

And I saw the years and decades that came before. Changing my major a million different times. Trying to find my place in this world. Art school. Gallery work. Yoga. Struggling. Financially. Emotionally. Trying to figure it all out.

All of that collapsed into this one moment, where I saw myself so clearly in that park.

Happy. Joyful. Free.

Living a life beyond beyond my wildest dreams.

The progress has been quiet and slow. Who knew? It was all leading to this.

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